My car...

In case you were wandering...My Honda Insight is still doing just fine and getting ready to roll 100K... and she's getting 65MPG.. nice!!!!

I have a red neck buddy who wouldn't ride in my car because he said it was effeminate....

Sad thing is.. I don't ride in his truck now because he can't afford to fill it (44 gal tank and 13mpg)

who's laughing now eh? me baby.. me.. I emailed him this morning to remind him that I'm getting over 60MPG on my 82mile commute to work... for some reason he didn't reply to my email....

D

I'm depressed.. ugh

Yep... it's true.. it's true... feelin blu...

I wasn't going to jot anything down because I'm not feelin chipper...

I figured I'd at least get some words out...

I'm glad to say that at least I don't drink anymore.. thanks to Ro and Avi..

I do look forward to feeling better soon... this usually passes in a week or two..

In the mean time I'll stick to being sober.. and maintain my painted on smile for Ro and Avi's sake..

I did go mtb riding on sunday (schweeeet).... my circa 1997 handmade in Durango yeti mtn bike was smooth and forgiving... and yep I crashed once.. with a nice consolation prize of cactus in my knee...

my knee (right knee) hurts when I don't ride every few days... I'm doing pretty good hiding the limp at least... BTW Dan doesn't receive sympathy very well.. it's my blockheaded disposition I'd guess if I had to say... so I'm calling the knee doc for another session of: one "horse sized shot full of knee lube/steroids" a week for 5 weeks... yaaa.. can't wait.. it feels good.. kinda like what draino would feel like being injected under the knee cap.... I usually leave the office pale, feeling like I wanna puke and grumpy.. the best post knee shot remedy for me has been (seriously the truth): limping to the parking lot.. and cursing at the top of my lungs and wanting to drink.. I know it's anti-social behavior but it helps clear the "all too real experience" from my minds eye.. ugh... beats a knee replacement...

Also... Ro and I saw Jerry Seinfeld at the performing arts center this past Saturday..... it was a religious experience..

~Dan

I've been slackin...

So..

It's been a while and you don't have to remind me about how lazy I am.. I KNOW!!

so.. recap the last 5 months..

bike riding... yes... 3 crashes.. no broken bones.. minor scrapes..

punk shows.. NOFX, Pennywise, and Mike Ness.. no broken bones, no fights :)

Camping.. 1 time.. with Avi and the 1st Lady Rochelle

Rafting... 1 time... numbers run on the Arkansas river soon to be on the Royal Gorge

one Birthday party for Avi.. 2years old now..


happy spring!

I FEEL MY AGE

So I really feel my age lately and it kinda sux. I “bit it” four times yesterday. Well.. that’s old BMX lingo for crashing, going down, gravity induced body skid… whatever you want to call it, this dude met the hard surface four friggin times yesterday morning in the stretch of less than a mile. Ice was covering ALL surfaces yesterday morning during my 5:50am sprint for the bus on my way to work. It’s not that I didn’t see the ice nor did I ignore it. Plain and simple, I attempted to ride it and I paid the price.

I still trust Cherry but there is only so much that she can do in “ice rink” conditions. It obviously helps tremendously that she’s a fixed gear. The principle being that one can slow down/stop with out brakes by applying back pressure onto the pedals. .. Think of it like this.. the difference between driving a manual tranny car vs. an automatic tranny car on ice/snow. The experienced drivers will tout that being able to manually downshift and thus slowdown on slick surfaces allows you much more control vs. applying the brakes on the slick stuff and white knuckling it until you slow down… yata yata yata going fixed is the way to go on the slick stuff. Then you ask… I thought Cherry wore studs? Well she does.. but I guess physics and gravity prevail some times. After each time the tires went out from under me I did inspect the ice.. I could see the deep scratches in the ice from the studs, ugh.. The first crash I friggin slid with cherry for about 15 feet. It’s a strange sensation to be sliding on the ice in the early morning quiet. I did luck out because no-one in their right mind was driving or walking in the chilly vicinity of Cherry and I. Thus I was all alone in my world of painful slaps onto the ice. Good thing too.. because the last crash caused me to yell “FU*K!!!!!!!” at the top of my lungs… not too proud of that but deep down inside the punk in me says “F it!.. These things happen” and it’s the only way the pissed off cry baby in me can cope with the frustration of freezing my ass off, slipping on the ice AND bashing my shin on the pedal all the while sliding into the curb and coming to an abrupt stop.

So. I feel my age.. I wanted to ride in today but first things first. I woke up at 5:10.. crawled outa bed and WOW.. I was stiff.. my shin is black and blue… my left bum cheek is sore as hell and my ribs are telling me to stay home and soak in the tub…. That said.. I got up and stretched for 30 minutes and couldn’t muster the will/strength to get on Cherry this morning let alone ride my indoor spin bike. Lest I forget I still have about 25 ~30 lbs to loose before July 12^th triple bypass ride. Ugh.. I’m hurting today and I am so feeling my age..

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not easily defeated and I WILL reach my goal.. but right now I gotta rely on my MIND & SPIRIT to give me a helping hand, because my BODY is sore and battered.

I am riding a nice 30mile training loop tomorrow morning. It will be the 1^st time this year that I’ll be on my circa 1995 Yeti road bike (also a classic and sought after by many a spandex wearing roadie..). Should be a lovely ride. She only weighs a mere 18lbs, climbs like a goat and runs like a cheetah. She’s fast, nimble and I think she’s jealous of Cherry getting all the attention as of late. I am hoping that my legs will notice the difference between a 30lb uphill ride and an 18lb race machine.

Yep.. I’m feeling old… and not to mention being Pissed that I’ll miss the Face to Face show in Cali, along with missing the local Bad Religion shows.. AND not having the $$$ to be able to see NOFX in Texas. Sux being in Denver sometimes.. the music scene is kinda lame and the older I get I seam to rely on good music to get me through the day. I kinda think of it as supporting the arts.. well old art I’d have to say because it’s obvious that these bands and I are roughly the same age.. thus I think we are all feeling our age.

Add-on.. I was listening to a live NOFX album yesterday (on the bus right after I bit it) and the song "I, Melvin" was being piped into my ears. I don’t know why nor do I care.. but listening to this song caused a stream of emotions with in me.. ranging from the pull of trying to hold on to youth, the stress of being a Father and Husband, and the trying to maintain my individuality…

I really don’t know how to articulate how I feel right now.. other than… I FEEL MY AGE.

NOFX LYRICS

"I, Melvin"

Mascara hides the sleepless nights
Years of abuse, the downs and highs
A lonely drunk staggers on stage
Weathered and worn, battered and broken, I feel my age
Like a puppet on strings, look he strums and he sings, I feel like a cartoon
I'm alone on the stage, I'm the man on the moon
I'm the deer in the headlights, I'm the fish in the bowl
I'm on automatic pilot, I am remote controlled
Just a second guitarist, playing on the 3rd string
I'm the disclaimer, I'm a walking routine
I'm happily a cog, stand me up, plug me in
Like a robot I play all the songs, with a grin
I am Eric Melvin
I am Eric Melvin
I am Eric Melvin

Be cool and always remember to stretch after you fall to the earth.
~Dan

Happy February, here’s the meditation for the month…

the true way to study zen is

not verbal. just open yourself

and give up everything.

whatever happens, whether

you think it good or bad,

study closely and see what

you find out. this is the

fundamental attitude.

How I luv Cherry and what she does for me

So I’m back, feeling 100% better and darned glad not be sick anymore. I was able to get some riding in this weekend and loved it. For the 1^st time in weeks I was able to turn out some miles without the fear of freezing or slipping and thus falling on the ice. I rode “Cherry” over the weekend.

Cherry is my fixed gear circa 1984 specialized stumpjumper that’s gotta weigh in at close to 30 lbs or so. She’s punk cool, a nice touch of rust here and there on her stock grey paint (She’ll look sexy cool in a gloss black powdercoat some day) Oh ya.. she’s still sporting the big fat knobbies with snow studs…. Translation: she doesn’t coast EVER plus the killa rolling resistance of the studs gives me the sensation of constantly riding UPHILL! I know.. I’m nutty but I like the pain.. err.. work out that I get when I’m on her. We have an interesting relationship…. I’d have to categorize it as the classic love hate relationship. I love to ride her, she’s got sexy classic lines, she’s strong, agile and I trust her to never let me down. I hate her because she doesn’t accept my laziness (no cutting corners, no coasting, no falling asleep at the wheel, and I must always be engaged). She brings out the best in me. I gain clarity, peace of mind and health through riding/dancing with her.

In my mind I very often equate riding a fixie with dancing. You have to be engaged mentally and physically. While on the road there’s no stopping on a dime, so you gotta constantly be planning your route and keeping your eye out for potholes, ruts and not to forget about all the Jackholes on cell phones sharing the road with me. Not to mention that in order to pedal efficiently your body is engaged with the bike. I pedal and kick, squeeze my abbs, fluid shoulders, loosen my hips, lean and hold the saddle with my thighs, breath deeply and charge down the road eye’s WIDE… we are dancing together.. we are as one.. it’s action and reaction.. I zig and she zags, I kick the pedals and she spins up the momentum… kinda ying yang.

So.. I’m sore. I rode 16 miles on Saturday and Sunday. No big deal on a geared ride.. but on Cherry no free lunch. But I love it so much, pushing and kicking up and down the hills. Riding Cherry allows me to quench my thirst for being a bit odd/different (the punk in me) while not burning fossil fuels in the pursuit of leisure. No one ever says it.. but all the roadies check out each others bikes. I almost always get double takes like “what the hell is that?” Funny to see a rusty, fender wearing snow studded, single speed with a 240lb dude passing you on the hills isn’t it my roadie friends… One thing about riding Cherry…. She’s perfectly geared for my big meat legs to go crushing up the hills.. it’s always my lungs that check out before my legs and booty have the chance to show the white flag and surrender. Well at least for a while until my conditioning is where I want it.. then it’ll be the meat grinder for the legs etc.. something tells me I have a few months before I start blowing up my legs… Come mid March I’ll be in the right body/mind/spirit to start attacking the real mtns here in Colorado.

I always consider it a pride and honor “thing” when I ride. I’m a bit competitive and I like to attack on the hills, especially when the opportunity of catching a road cyclist who just blew past me on the down hill and now I get to catch and pass them on the hill…I know I’m not allowing myself to evolve much when I pull meat headesque competitive moves like this.. oh well.. forgive me…. so if you are gonna pass this fatty.. ya better keep kicking because I’m not letting up. This leads into my mind set/matra that I embrace while in the saddle and training. I always work hard and when I’m hurting I scream to myself “WITH PRIDE”. My Dad always suggested that you should never sell yourself short and to have “pride” in one’s actions. Well…. by me doing my best to maintain proper form: breathing completely, loosy goosy torso, full leg extensions in the saddle, focus on my “line” AND ABSOLUTELY NO rocking the bike side to side = efficiency at it’s best. I dub this “riding lazy”. I call it this because I enjoy being lazy, thus I don’t want to have to pedal 110 strokes up the hill when I could have only pedaled 100 = I’m lazy I only want to do the minimum to get the job done so I can have more time/energy for more riding. I know it’s a bit odd and maybe backwards to some, but it’s my motivator…. well that and honoring Cherry by doing my best for her because she always does her best for me.

So.. there’s a glimpse into the mind of a old punk like me. I feel good, sore legs and butt, lungs are getting into shape and I’m loosing some extra weight.. all is good..

OH ya.. Avi can identify and say ALL THE ABC’s, plus numbers 1~9. We’ve been working on numbers and letters outside the alphabet arena.. like signs, mailbox #’s etc.. he’s friggin sharp for being 20months old.. GO AVI!!.. I’m so happy and proud for him…

~Dan

I'm sick

Boooooo!! I'm sick... I tried to make believe I wasn't sick..

Truth is.. I'm sick and Avi is sick.... double ugh..